The Relic
$16.46
Product Description
Margo greene is an evolutionary biologist at a chicago museum. When a coworkers research crate arrives without the researcher green and her mentordr. Forck unpack and investi- gate the material which includes a superstitious relic and an unidentifiable virus found on some leaves native to brazil. Studio: Paramount Home Video Release Date: 08/22/2006 Starring: Penelope Ann Miller Linda Hunt Run time: 110 minutes Rating: R Director: Peter HyamsAmazon.com<... More >>
If you’re a hardcore horror fan looking for a hardcore monster movie with non-stop action and a high body count….. See “Aliens”. But if you’re looking for a monster movie with a dumb monster, dumb characters and only one exciting scene at the very end, then you just might like “The Relic”. The story is that a reptilian creature snuck into a museum, and killed a security guard. A few dumb detectives go into the museum to find out how the guard was killed. They want to keep the public from coming to the museum until the problem is dealt with, but the museum’s staff insists that the public be let in for the grand opening of their latest exibit. People come in by the thousands. Right in the middle of the tour, the creature causes some more problems, and the museum’s security computer locks the whole place down. Will the hundreds of thousands of no-name people be trapped inside for the monster to feast upon? Nope. Large, metal security doors start to close, like that scene in “Titanic”, and at least a billion people make it out alive. Instead of feasting on a sea of people in the main room, all the monster does is kill off two lovable dogs and an old, crippled guy. About twenty guests become trapped in the museum, and at least seventeen of them make it out alive. A stupid police guy leads those people out of the museum through a sewage system. He’s carrying a shotgun, but he never fires it, even when the monster is coming for them, and he has a clear shot. Why did he have a shotgun to begin with if he couldn’t figure out how to make it work? A hundred-thousand billion people survive who you could care less about. Instead of having many expendable no-name characters get eaten, most of the few characters who do die have names and backgrounds. I hate this movie so much! This movie make Hulk angry! Hulk smash terrible monster movie that rips off scenes from better movies! And I should probably mention that it takes a good hour before anything that looks like it could get scary happens. If you still want to see this lame film, regardless of what I say, read this: In the scene where the monster is chasing the large group of slow-moving idiots through the sewers, the monster gives up on the chase. Yeah. Sad, isn’t it? Still care to watch? Don’t. I beg of you. This is pure filth, and a real let-down for horror buffs like myself.
Rating: 1 / 5
I don’t like the fact that somebody can take a horror movie and turn it into a joke!I couldn’t even get through this movie once.I just don’t like films that express monsters as four-legged dog creatures.The Relic is a story about a ritual gone wrong when some foolish explorer actually drinks this weird concoction from a tribe of Indians.Mysteriously enough,the liquid turns him into a beastly creature that lives in the sewers under a mansion.Don’t get this movie!
Rating: 1 / 5
The Relic starts off promising enough, but by it’s halfway point it becomes a predictable and routine creature feature with a just plain bad CGI animated monster and plot holes aplenty. Not to mention, what is up with the lighting? The film is so dimly lit that it’s hard to tell just what is going on and who is who, and the cast (featuring Penelope Ann Miller, Tom Sizemore, and Linda Hunt) is beyond wasted. The Relic does have some good gore effects and a good jolt here and there, but it’s nothing worthwhile at all. Like the above Amazon review states, you should do yourself a favor and watch the original Alien and it’s first sequel Aliens to see a monster fest done right, and leave the Relic with the horde of other derivative Alien rip offs on the shelf.
Rating: 1 / 5
I rented this video from my local shop a while back expecting nothing more than simple entertainment, a monster movie that would be fun on a Saturday night. Boy, did I make a mistake. This is a dreadful mess. There is little or no suspense developed, the creature is unbelievable, and the last quarter of the film is so ridiculous that it should be silly but is just tedious. This is one of the worst movies I have seen recently.
Rating: 1 / 5
Haven’t read the book, so can’t compare, but The Relic on film is simply pathetic. Yes, it’s a monster movie. The problem is, this movie is no better than most of its genre, and worse than some. The monster looks like a refugee from one of the Star Wars episodes. The acting and dialogue are terrible. What a yawner!
Rating: 1 / 5